Reveal Yourself to Us

[`¤*«مُحمدْ البادِيْ»*-¤]

Do you think it’s appropriate for girls to confess? To take initiative and propose marriage? ​

 

[أبو سليمان]

I don't see a reason not to. It is true that the culture here is not supporting this, but things are changing. I really don't see it is shame or not approperiate if a girl proposed, what I see is a respected girl who simply asked a man for marriage. There is no harm on that.

What do you think about it Abo Raseil??

 

[`¤*«مُحمدْ البادِيْ»*-¤]

Thanks Dilbert, I posted this topic elsewhere, and one of our sisters said that a guy will not accept such proposal unless he needs or being forced to. Of course, another participant said that doing such is shameless and goes against the Arab manners and social perspective What do you think? ​

 

[أبو سليمان]

I don't agree, the man will respect the woman more, even if the marriage did not happen, he will still respect her more than before

And it was nice seeing you avoiding the question but come on Abu Raseil, what is your opinion about it

 

[أبو سليمان]

One more thing, I heared Hadith from Dr. Omar AbdulKafi and I got it from the net:

قال أبو عبد الله حدثنا علي بن عبد الله قال: حدثنا مرحوم قال: سمعت ثابتا البناني قال: كنت عند أنس وعنده ابنة له قال أنس (جاءت امرأة إلى رسول الله -صلى الله عليه وسلم- تعرض عليه نفسها قالت: يا رسول الله! ألك بي حاجة فقالت: بنت أنس ما أقل حياءها واسوأتاه! قال: هي خير منك رغبت في النبي -صلى الله عليه وسلم- فعرضت عليه نفسها )

source: http://ibn-jebreen.com/?t=books&cat=7&book=95&toc=6681&page=5904&subid=33062

 

[`¤*«مُحمدْ البادِيْ»*-¤]

You are truly dear to me

I do not think it’s something impolite to do such thing, however, you should bear in mind this may become risky and the consequences are not guaranteed. See, first of all, this girl may put her feelings into this proposal to the wrong person. Not all of men think or behave as you do. Some just want to kill time and have fun nothing else. Second. Society have no mercy and people only live to feed on the rumors. If a word goes outside by mistake, the reputation of the girl and her family will be destroyed and the guy may push her away not to caught in the fire

My sister I quoted her words up said that a girl proposed to a man but he dumped her merely because she took the initiative and confessed. She said that despite the girl is a good and a admirable person and known for her great morals, she was shunned away for being an initiative
There is another story which says that a girl proposed, yet the guy apologized and told her politely that he was not into marriage yet. But not all stories have a wonderful end like this one

For the Hadith, society is not educated like you, me or the members of alburaimi.net. You and me or others can say anything they want in the virtual world and on the forums, but when the moment of the truth comes believe me it’s hard if not impossible to stand firm against the current unless to take responsibility and bear the harsh consequences ​

 

[أبو سليمان]

There will always be the variable factor that I cannot disagree with. The same things could be understood differently. Well, is it risky? yes, that is why the girl should choose the man carefully. I won't say she should predict his reaction, but at least to understand him. One of my friends received a proposal, and he got married to the girl, and she is religious girl by the way. And about the society, I guess you are right, and this might be the reason why the girl is reserved and don't think about stepping this step

 

[`¤*«مُحمدْ البادِيْ»*-¤]

Thanks dear for the cooperation you have proved her, I am really pleased to have chat with you
You made me have the feeling that my topic is worth discussion
​

 

[أبو سليمان]

It is, may be you should write the arabic version.. just suggesting

 

[`¤*«مُحمدْ البادِيْ»*-¤]

I revealed my opinion here and I may not say something new to Arabic readers
It’s fine for me as long I wrote it here in this section, and I am sure many have had a look on it
Thanks alot
​